Author Archive

Lets go over some things I like;

1. Snowboarding. Especially snowboarding in Jackson Hole. Shit is dangerous there. Plus when you live through the day you can go to Million Dollar Cowboy Bar and sit on those saddle stools.

2. Brother Ali. Dude scares me but I’ve seen him do his rapping a few times and I like it. Plus the whole Midwest-on-rhymesayers-jock thing and all.

3. Justin Timberlake. Homie had no choice but to get cool, otherwise he was going to get his ass kicked. So he starts killing pop music, killing it on the reg for Saturday Night Live, killing it on those Sony commericials. “And the more sports you watch on a Sony, the better you get at sports.” You cannot even deny the 500% delivery on that line. Even if it is jock-related.

So I’m pretty much 100% down for this, except the quality:

TGSIASNW (thank god SIA starts next week)

Totinos photo. Notice the lack of gold medal, caring.

Start it out with the old news: Danny Davis got brought down last Saturday night/Sunday morning. And the desk jocks at yahoo sports have chimed in and gone Berzerker. People all over there and even on snowboarding forums are getting pissed, calling for contract clauses limiting the risk for this kind of accident. For the most part the 500+ comments on that story are from poeple who have as little right to comment on snowboarding as fat-mouthed, Christine Brennan.

These people are actually out there saying what DD did was stupid, and acting as though he has no right to be out after dark because he might make the Olympic team. He just cost the USA a gold medal! I guess that’s what important here, winning a gold for ‘Merica.

But here’s the thing-I doubt many snowboarders, Sean Blanco excluded, care too much about the Olympics. What the masses see is hardly a simulacrum of what most of use do with our friends. The exposure is a horrible misrepresentation of the sport. The one trait the bonds all snowboarders is the simple fact that it’s fun. It’s the only reason to do it. You get to be outside, fucking off with your friends, and just enjoying your life. This aspect is completely omitted from any broadcast of the sport. When it’s no longer fun, people move on, for others it stays with them forever. You can outgrow playing football and video games, but for many there isn’t a day that goes by that they don’t at least think about riding.

I don’t think the same can be said about many of the events in the Olympics. Never once have I been told “OMG, you need try figure skating. I’ll take you. We’ll wake up at 5 a.m. drive two hours, and get on the ice just as soon as the Zamboni rolls off.” Yet with snowboarding this happens all winter long, all across the country, for people of all ages. Whether it’s to snowboard some shit hill that’s actually a covered-over landfill in Southeastern Wisconsin, or driving into the 600 inches of fresh Tahoe got this week.

Now I’m not saying that all Olympic sports are not fun. Skiing, fencing, soccer, those are all legitimate good times. And I suspect there is some secret enjoyment in curling that I have yet to figure out. Team sports obviously can be a fun beyond the peak competition phase. I know plenty of grown-ass people who still get stoked to play in their local soccer/basketball/volleyball club. But with most of the individual sports it seems once you’ve been eliminated from competition, you’re done. Sure you can still run, or swim lap, but then it seems to be more about fitness.

Rarely do you see people who have realized their competition days are over, just going out for a day of  pole vaulting. Even my homey Nate used to ski jump, and at some point he realized a) I’m not going to make the Olympic team. b) shradding is way more fun. And at the time snowboarding wasn’t even in the Olympics. The only person he had to compete with was me. This competition has been going on for 20 years now, and still all I ever want to do is better him for the day and have a drink with him when we’re done.

This is how snowboarding differs from everything else in the Olympics. It’s not a rigid discipline. It’s hardly even a discipline. You can take any of the top ranked pipe riders and drop them on another part of the mountain and they will still rip. And if there’s a contest they will probably still place. Most importantly, if they’re doing it with their friends they’ll be 100% stoked on it.

That’s just how snowboarding works. You’re out there because you like it. And if you’re competing, you’re most likely competing with the people you enjoy riding with. And when the day is over you celebrate a day well lived.

Now enter in the professional shrad-kid. This person has devoted their whole life to feeling good about what they do everyday. Hanging out with friends, and having someone pay you to fly around the world, looking for the best spots to ride. And more importantly if you’re personable and have a marketable image you’re going to get a lot more money.

Danny Davis has the mix of amazing skills, personality and money behind him letting him do whatever he wants. So he rips it up everyday, he’s pushing himself against people like Kevin Pearce, Scotty Lago, and Mason Aguirre and there is no denying the friendship they’ve got. And when Kevin went down DD was dedicating his runs to him. That’s what seemed to be pushing him. And he was doing well. He bangs down a couple of ridiculous wins and happens to be well on his way to the Olympics. Then he gets hurt fucking around. I’m sure Danny’s a little bummed he won’t be in the Olympics, but I would guess he’s more upset that he’s not riding.

For snowboarding the Olympics are like an afterthought, not many are working to be “the best in the world and bring home gold for the USA.”At this point if the games are there for the taking, you might as well go for it. But if mainstream society wants this to happen, it needs to understand snowboarders. They are not you typical Olympians. They are not commercial ready like Apollo Ono (of course, except for Sean Blanco). They are dirty. Their attire, boards and attitudes glamorize the underbelly of society. Make no mistake, snowboarders are the offspring of surfers and skateboarders, not figure skaters and skiers. They will stand at the top of the halfpipe, with a hangover, take one last pull off a cigarette and still put down one of the best runs in the world. Snowboarding should not compromise this. It’s what makes shradding so great. To have contract clauses limiting what riders can and cannot do when they aren’t standing at the top of a halfpipe is to truly limit snowboarding. The the heart of snowboarding will be gone. And to all those who said snowboarding died 15 years ago this won’t even be a recognizable.

I think there is something Zen-like in this, so I gonna keep watching it on a loop.

Letterpress Test from lorene on Vimeo.

But check that shit at 0:46, that was early some industrial accident action right there. I know this shit. I saw The Mangler.

Thanks to Lorenius for this

WTFuck is with this Busyness?

Friday: Alpine Valley shit got real freaky nasty on that tree that Red Bull deforested for kids to play on.Yay to MODA3 for organizing that shit and for getting Kid Cut Up out there. Good showing from the kids who weren’t even borned when I was riding a sims switchblade (or pocketknife or 1440 or whatever is was) backwards because my homey nate was goofy-footed and I was regular.

But shit’s hectic. Planting seeds and such. Meanwhile the USAFISWTF Olympic snowboarders are getting snapped off one by one. I think Sean Blanco signed a deal with el diablo for this Au-79. If this is the case i respect that. Next, maybe he can pop off some of those mo-mos. For real though, devil worship is just another religion (i.e. crutch) though the iconography is way better.

[madlib sample]MEANWHILE[/madlibsample]

Today is the day. Everyone who is anyone will be there, so I assume I’ll see you there.  

A few days ago I dropped in and got interview by Hoon Hwang. We talked about shradding. He blogt it over on Souff of the Norff

Here’s an excerpt for those of you who got to know:

Hoon: Capita vs Rome

Rumorator: Rome still exists?

Frankly, because I got nothing else, this one goes out to my favorite NewZealand/Hab in fancy jeans.

(For tonight’s performance the part of Lagos will be played by Jakarta, Indonesia)

Come on this one is easy. Lagos for the win. No one in Riverwest is even considering a shower until the  spring thaw comes.

Lagos: 4
Riverwest: 0

1. Who’s on the seventh floor, brewing alternatives?

There are few TV personalities I like. And one of the few is Conan O’Brien. Also there are few TV personalities I hate more than Christine Brennen. And one of them is Jay Leno. You see Brennan is just an naive. She knows nothing of what she speaks (save for the Ice Capades). Leno on the other hand has made millions upon millions putting people to sleep with bigotry and tired jokes. And he’s an egotist of the worse kind. He had his run of late night and copped David Letterman’s style for too long. Then when NBC told him it was time to go, he whined his way into a 9pm show. Then as NBC fell into the toilet Jay Leno was right there to take a shit on it, climb a top the mound and proclaim himself Hey-sues. Meanwhile everyone else was like, “No dude, you’re just shitty.”

Now NBC wants to push Conan around. Fuck That. And for now it seems like The Irish is sticking up for himself. I hope it works. We need more Conan.

2. What’s in the bottom drawer, waiting for things to give?

Since I’ve been getting down on this snowboardering scene one thing has remained constant: Todd Richards. Well that and Burton Bindings. The thing is for a long time I was opposed to TR, mostly because there was no place close to me selling Morrow decks, but also because this dude was on TV. He was the fucking sell-out. He was on the X-lames talking about the importance of a shradder being a pizza delivery boy (a job i would later take to try getting more in touch with my peoples).  I thought “What a schmuck!” But here’s the thing, TR had something figured out, he saw where snowboarding was going, and goddammit he was going do what he could to keep it legit. Everyone else was making money ,dragging snowboarding into the mainstream, and they didn’t give a fuck who spoke about it. Shit. If it wasn’t for Todd we’d probably have Christine Brennan calling Roast Beets and Frontside Indies in the half-pike.

I don’t even think I caught up with TR’s level until four or five years ago. It just seemed to click. The dude is 100% amazing and a credit to our game, plus he’s funny. Need more proof? Look at his interview with Method Mag:

Todd Richards: Electric Chair part 1

Todd Richards; Electric Chair part 2

3. Conquering myself until I see another hurdle approaching.

I would listen to this:

4. Say we can, say we will. Not just another drop in the ocean.

This dude lived twenty minutes in the future. I have to imagine that is something like being enlightened. But homeboy had it all wrong about computer graphix.

I spend way too much time pumping the NPR. I mean that shit just clangs in my place. I’ve even got a loopt podcast of Doualy Xaykaothao reports that I let spin all night. That shit even keeps the ASIMOs awake. Think about that–They’re robots, they’re plugged in, and they still can’t get any recharge time.

But that isn’t what’s important. This is what is: I was stoked to hear them call out James Cameron and his new movie.

Basically you’ve got Neda Ulaby just killing it on the vocals here, busting up Avatar and some new “Tik Tok” song. Previous to this broadcast I had never even heard of the song, but it sounded like pop schlock. Then last night I had the pleasure of catching Ke$ha on Conan.

Fuck me.

I knew, as soon as people started hyping Avatar, I wanted nothing to do with it. Over blown, ego-stroking, poor excuse to of a movie. I’ve been pretty opposed to James Cameron for a while now. Sure I saw Abyss, but that was only because I heard there were some boobs in it. Aliens was a good flick, but seemed to be way to similar to a movie I had already seen. It was called Alien and Ridley Scott had already kicked some ass. And I’m proud to say I’ve never seen Titanic. Nevermind the fact that I think LDC and Kate Winslet are great actors, I knew the movie was bound to be 100% trash.

So you’re going to tell me Avatar was a good movie. I’m sure you’re still sleeping on that Captain EO joint. Avatar fans are typically the same poeple who are pumping KISS-FM or whatever you pop radio station is. And you love this Ke$ha track. Seriously, had I known in my younger days that all it took to get girls excited was a string of hyperboles, I wouldn’t have spent so much time skateboarding. It crap music, your personality on Conan’s show was crap, and your name is spelled with a dollar sign.Not even three of them. It basically means you’re shallow and broke.

Plus you cannot, really spell your name like that. I learned this when the state of Vermont wouldn’t let me legally change my name to 4700, because I refused to budge on the use of Arabic numerals.