Posts Tagged ‘food’

Spreading the stoke & other shit

Tuesday, November 27th, 2012

Last Wednesday, the day before Turkey Day, I took a 2 1/2 hour drive up to Killington in the green state of Vermont to ride. Day one of the season. I was pretty amped for it. Making it more exciting was the fact that I was going up with a friend who I had never rode with, and it was just his 3rd time on shred stick ever. He told me what he could do and what he has done, and much to his credit he didn’t hype himself up and claim to able to charge it when in reality all he could do was the falling leaf. Emphasis on “falling”. Because if there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s when a person is all like “I get sick with it on a snowboard” and when I ride with them they are exposed as a fraud. That’s grounds for tar and feathering. I never hype myself up. Never. Once someone finds out I ride and am then asked if I’m “any good” at snowboard riding, I usually laugh it off and say something corny like “I guess, I dunno, I just like to have fun.” I rarely explain that this is my 21st year riding or that I have taught people how to ride as an instructor since age 15 (though long since worked as one) or that I once had USASA Level 2 coaching certification and coached freestyle snowboarding (park) up at a little hill in New Hampshire. Me? Brag about shit like that? Never.

Anyhow, my buddy was very humble and said he wasn’t good, and he even feared that I would get upset at his lack of skill and be pissed he was holding me back from having fun. Nonsense. I love spreading the stoke, especially when it’s to a friend doing something I love. He even bought my lift ticket as a “thanks for sticking it out with me” show of appreciation…or simply because he’s the shit.

There were only a handful of trails open and the “bunny hill” wasn’t one of them so I looked at him and said, “guess we’re taking it to the top”, as I pointed to the gondola. I could tell he was a little scared at what he was going to face at the summit, but I assured him the green runs were really mellow, and that he wanted a bit more pitch as it’d help him out. Riding up in the gondy, he was snapping pics on his phone, sporting a giant grin and looking more excited than nervous.

view behind us as we moved towards the heavens.

I won’t go into the specifics of what was taught and how, as we’ve all been there and can pretty much imagine what went down. But know this: he had his balance and could control his board from killing people downhill from him. However, he could not turn for shit. Yet. The length of the run we were taking was probably just under a mile. Took us almost an hour. Constant stopping, coaching and assuring he was good and not going to kill himself or others if he just gave turning a try. Got to the bottom. He was SOAKED with sweat, and he didn’t layer too heavily either. He was getting a serious workout. We each slammed a bottle of water down the hatch and decided to run it back. Off to the gondola we went.

This time, he finally started to link turns, riding with shit tons more confidence, and stopped less frequently. Making it even more impressive, is that the man-made snow was turning really mashed potato-like and becoming harder on the legs to keep the edges up. He didn’t care. He rocked that shit. The level of stoke and confidence he had hit was the highest I saw all day. All of what I was saying to him was starting to click. Total time, on the same run, to the bottom this go around: maybe 30 minutes. He was exhausted. And rightfully so. Called it quits after that, which is something I told him there is no shame in. I told him only he knows when he’s had enough and when to walk off the hill before possibly getting hurt. I also explained to him to never call last run. He understood. So I took a few solo runs, and I too got tired. After all, it was my first day of the season and my legs were burning.

the stick says it all.

We both had a great first day. On the ride home we discussed his progress, music and where to eat. I was going to introduce him to the glory that is Tacos Tacos in Ludlow, but he was adamant that I drive south to Brattleboro and hit up The Vermont Country Deli. I had never been and I was happy I took his advice to stop there. HOLY SHIT is the food there great! I got a cup of baked potato, cheddar and prosciutto soup and a honey bbq ham sammich in a garlic & herb wrap. Both were quite tasty, but the soup was good enough to stab someone over if they got between me and it. The fact that it looked like baby vomit did nothing to deter me from destroying it in a matter of minutes. I could have gotten so much more awesomeness too; they had pulled pork, mac & cheese, pot stickers any sammich your little heart desired and more candy, pop corn, chocolate and pastries than your little heart could desire. I had wished I had smoked before stopping in just so I would’ve ordered more…because the worst case scenario is that I’d have leftovers.

if you don’t stop here, you’re an asshole.

It’s safe to say that I am looking forward to playing snowboards this season. Got yet another person addicted to it. And in no time, I’m sure, he’ll be slaying it along my side. If you haven’t had a chance to ride yet this year, I feel bad for you. It’s pretty much all that and a bag of chips…but I’m sure you already knew that.

As far as other shit that happened since then: there was Thanksgiving (meh), and then Black Friday when some shopping was done by yours truly and topped off by rewarding/punishing myself with McDonald’s breakfast. Egg McMuffins just need to be had sometimes. Also, there was football. Specifically, Giants vs. Packers football. Suck it Wisconsin. And finally, I went to a job fair yesterday to see if I could become gainfully employed again. Seeing as I have been riding the #Funemployment wave and watching oodles of Law & Order, Law & Order SVU and Law & Order Criminal Intent, I figured I’d shoot for the stars and get me a lawyer or detective job. Didn’t want a property manager or building super position though…they, more often than not, seem to be the ones that always find the dead bodies and have to call it in to the cops. Dunno if I could handle that kinda responsibility on top of finding the drain snake to clear the obstruction in the sink in apartment 5E. Anyhow, no such luck finding any jobs that I liked or that started off with a salary of over $500,000/year.

rispekt.

 

-CLK

2012-1

Monday, January 2nd, 2012

Happy New Year!
Whoo-hoo!
Okay, now can-it and let’s get to work here. We’ve got things to cover:

1th
Utah in 4 days. I got $5 that says I get no more than 9 runs in, over 3 days. Last time I was in Park City people were telling me what a horrible year it was. That was six years ago. This year people are saying “No really, this is the worst year ever.” I’ve seen this before, Jackson Hole in 1998 and again in 2004. Worst years ever.

Anyway, if you need me from Friday–Monday I will be camped out at CobraDogs.

2st
There was a mini QCC ‘leven thrown down. It was just me and Chip. And it involved Ashley’s and JJ’s Fish and Chicken.

Ashley’s: Located at 15rd and Center, people have been talking about this place being more legit than Speed Kween, which seems to be a point of contention. So we went. Parked the Silver Spurt and walked in. The interior is void of any seating, except for like 3 chairs against the wall. There  was also Mortal Combat II, Ms Pac Man, some zombie shooting game, and a couple of unplugged video poker machines. The entire customer area was about 300sq. ft. and somehow they claim to run weekend buffets in this joint.

There were several menus, but none of them had pricing on them. One menu featured “Rack of Ribs” (no pricing), so I stepped to woman behind the bulletproof glass.
“I’ll have the rack of ribs?” that question mark represents the uncertainty of what I was getting myself into.
“Beans and slaw?”
“What?”
“YOU WANT THE BEANS AND SLAW?”
“Yeah.”
“AND?”
“A soda…a mountain dew I guess.”
“$19.89”

Shit.
JJ’s: The meal from JJ’s was catfish nuggets, salt, fries, salt and chicken wings with salt. It was like $9 with the salt and a free grape soda.

We went back to Co-host’s joint to eat this mess. The ribs from Ashley’s were stacked like 3 levelles deep and came with 4 pieces of white bread. The ribs were pretty damn tasty. The slaw wasn’t worth putting in my mouth. And the beans, while they looked unappealing they were okay, but not good enough to put in my quickly filling gut.

Moving into the JJ’s meal, Chip had warned me that the fries sucked balls and there may be bones in the catfish nuggets. After one bite of everything we began discussing the finer points of JJ’s triple salting process. That was basically the highlight of JJ’s. That was seriously the saltiest food I have ever consumed. Even when my parents were in their hippie phase and we had goats with salt blocks to lick and my older brother made me lick that salt block, I was thinking, “This is salty, but someday I will eat at a place called JJ’s and it will be way saltier.”

In the end I was a little bummed out. I wanted JJ’s to be good. I wanted it to be this gem that everyone just drives past and assumes if a crappy place to eat [Eddie Vedder voice] even though [/Eddie Vedder voice] it’s amazing. But nope, it’s just a crappy place to get salty food. The mural inside is shitty too.

Ashley’s on the other hand it worth going back to. So solid. Just don’t get the full rack of ribs.

3nd
I was in the middle of bagging on these books, when someone told me how good they were. I really don’t believe them, but it made me feel like an asshole.

Whatever. I judge these books by their covers, but more by their shitty titles.

4st
I drove over my snowboard, and I really working on those lip slides.

Sushi ushi ushi

Monday, February 14th, 2011

Currently discussing haircut boobs.

Also, this is fucking awesome:

MegaEaterWeekend

Monday, June 7th, 2010

Still Stuffed.

I’m 90 percent sure I ate my weight in foods this weekend. But it was my birthday weekend, so that cool right? Whatever, fatty.

Okay here goes.

Started the weekend off with Coa. Good restaurant with a really crappy setting. By that I mean it’s in the suburbs, connect to a mall. But at least it’s not some chain joint. I mean, really if I wanted chain eats I’m sure there were seven Olive Gardens and 13 Chili’s within a five-miles radius.  It is the suburbs after all.

I had the pastor it was good. Pork Count: 1

Friday birthday dinner, fattened up at the Pasta Tree. Having never been there, I was delightfully impressed. Our waiter was killing it all night. Solid dude, I never got his name but he seemed legit. I ate up some antipasto action and followed it with a carbonara with the godzilla-est pieces of bacon in the sauce. Deathgrip on that shit. YOU CANNOT STOP!

Even more amazing that the food was the couple the came out of the alley and sat at the end table on the patio. And they sat side by side, looking out over everyone who was eating.  And this was not a romantic side by side, more like Rhianna and Jay-Z running that town, but on  a smaller scale. The lady had a dog with her and looked like her name might have been Super-Ital.  Meanwhile over my shoulder was some yellow girl. DJ tan-errific. Pork count: 2

Saturday I headed out to Maxie’s Southern Comfort. Landed with a gimlet made of Hendrick’s Gin and muddled Cucumber. I think I might be drinking these the rest of the summer. I don’t even know why I order food in this place. I could simply live off the cornbread. But no, I ordered what turned out to be 15 pounds of pulled pork. So good. the right amount of heat and accompanied by some killer baked beans. I think I took 9 pounds of food home from that joint. Pork count: 3

After dinner I caught up with Keef Love and took his money playing cee-lo like a proper gentleman. Then gave a lot of it up to some other dude named Joey. Washed it all down with Moscow Mules. I took a picture of my cash, but lost it in the stupid-ass blackberry update. Now my phone doesn’t recognize my memory card, so all my hard work of sexting with delivery driver from #1 Chinese Food is for not.

Sunday I ate left-overs that pushed my pork count to about 25 and watched Inglorious Basterds which kind of made me feel guilty about all the pork.

Then I woke up on Today and saw this drift through the twitter trough:

The Triple Cork from torstein horgmo on Vimeo.

So I’m pretty sure that means snowboarding is just getting-the-fuck-out-of-hand. Time to hang it boys, time to hang it up.

The Things We Need to Cover

Tuesday, April 6th, 2010

1. Yesterday was opening day at Miller Park. Sadly the Brew Crew played some ugly baseball and dropped the game to the Cololame-o Rockies. But on a positive note Craig  Counsell was in action (not much action) which gives hope of the Craig “Clutch”  Counsell Posse making a appearance.

The day started out with FredyT telling me he and his lady were waiting outside, while I still had a toothbrush in my mouth. So I toss on my gameday cap, grab the shades and bust out. We meet up with the rest of the crew and immediately proceed to sit in traffic for over an hour as they slowly let people in to that parking lots. But once we got in, it was go time. Meats, beers, and picnic salads as far as the stomach could see. I also saw more shirtless people than I care to remember and 3 dudes with fauxhawks, which kind of made me feel bad for America. The Polish won the sausage race.

I was able to snap a couple photos with my smahtfone. Nothing major, just some shots that really captured the essence of the day. Please enjoy:

For all of you who don’t have parking lots at your ballpark this is what you are missing. A sea of chipper people grilling out and playing weird games with beanbags and whatever else they can toss back and forth.

Most people were wearing their opening day gear. Some poeple were wearing pajamas because the Lots opened up that early. In the case of this Brewers Fan it’s one and the same.

That mess right there is 100% delicious. Keylo and Poco manned the grills and made sure everyone ate with reckless abandon.

I didn’t even know you could get Corona Light in a can.

2. I just referenced Spirit Air as the Fung Wah of airlines. I think that was an insult to the Fung Wah. But  the Fung Wah hasn’t been as exciting since they stopped letting women over 50 smoke on the bus and dropped the “standing room only” tickets.

Imagine it though–A Spirit Air plane just dropping in on some airport. The captain comes out and starts yelling at everyone to hurry  and get off. The plane gets cleared and he’s back in the air, just out out reach of the TSA officers chasing the plane down the run way. That’s the way the the Fung was does a proper drop.

Also note that on the Fung Wah webpage you can reference “Frequently Asked Questions” as well as their “Top 10 questions.” That’s mega-reference-resourcefulness right there.

A Nice Place For Waterwings and Cannonballs.

Wednesday, February 24th, 2010

Maybe you cold motherfuckers forgot it’s Black History Month. Well there is no better way to celebrate than in your office cafeteria.  Check out this nugget of amazing menu from the Basking Ridge campus today.

Brace yourself:

Personally, I’m going to go home, sit on my couch and eat Ants on a Muthafuckin’ Log. That’s a nod to G.Washinton Carver right there. Then I’m going to make a list of all the black people I know and send them belated Happy Black History Month cards. And I’ll probably send them links to Yobeat. I’m also going to have to apologize for Elvis Presley. And If i thought this was a race thing, I would apologize for it, but in reality it’s just hackery.

 

Amber Lamps it is not.
However this IS Amber Lamps:

compliments of the FlawsyFiles

 Damn, I love internetery. Now if you don’t mind, I’m going go write a review for google wipes. Shayboarderism.

Time to get your slack on

Monday, January 4th, 2010

Alright all you desk-jockeys, cubicle crusaders, and office park aficionados, it’s back to normal work weeks. That means it time to get back on your blog routine. It goes like this: work 1/2 a day, eat lunch, check blogs. You know this is true. Deal with it. Get down with today.

Item #1: Thrashin’

Spectre of the Brocken once told me to stay away from civil service dramas. I always took that advice lightly. Like when your health teacher told you nothing good ever comes of drug use. I thought it was just some old man kicking some ancient mindset at me.

Then last night I found myself sucked into some serious civil service junk. Shit had me hooked. and I didn’t even jump in until it was half over. But it was about skateboardering, so I’m predisposed to getting caught up. And Just so we are all on the same page, here is the synopsis to last night’s Cold Case episode, Hoodrats, direct from the CBS website:

Synopsis

The team re-opens the 1995 case of a skateboarding prodigy who lived on the streets.

Full Recap

The cold case team opens up a case of Nash Simpson, a skateboarding prodigy who went missing in the 1990’s. The team discovers the body of a John Doe in an abandoned warehouse and they were able to identify the body as Nash Simpson. The team now has some clues to work with in his disappearance case. They discover that Nash had made many friends, but also made many enemies after he ran away from New Jersey to Philadelphia. He was able to parlay his skateboarding skills into a career. He was able to obtain a sponsor and was on his way to becoming a star but fell in with the wrong crowd. Ultimately, one of Nash’s new junkie friends betrayed and killed him in order to score his next fix.

Now we’re going to go over a few points here.

  1. No matter how many suburban white kids get skate decks they’re still going to get called hoodrats. Which is ridiculous because, it’s like  Badu said, looking for cheese don’t make you  a hoodrat. But hey, this is about cop dramas, and it’s best that CBS does whatever it can to maintain the tension between cops and kids with skate decks.
  2. Up-and-coming street skater Nash (probably named after Nash skateboards) was killed because he could “skate a line” no one else could. That’s right, Nash could do a kickflip off some ghetto ramp set-up. Seriously a kickflip. I better watch my back because at the end of my skating days i was tossing down kickflips like a beast. A kickflip is the culinary equivalent of a tuna melt.
  3. If they wanted to make this story realistic they should have focused more on Nash’s ability to skate the ghetto ramp. For real, that thing looked sketchy.
  4. Lastly to calm the erves of all the Suburban parents unwinding before bed, the proven killer was not the white kid. No it was the pan-asian kid. Like it should surprise anyone that it was the minority character. However I do have to give CBS a big high five to putting zero effort into this show other than giving the pan-asian a flannel to button all the way up, to also remind white folks that Latinos kill people too. Especially white kids who are good at at things.
  5. This show uses some visual element in which the characters are shown as themselves when the case went cold. It’s like a TV’s representation of a spank bank.  In this case I’m guessing it went cold in 1991 based on the use of a track off Siamese Dream. Like any dude in a pair of Droors would have been pumping that album.
  6. I was so pist no one ever used the term “thrash” or any variation of it.

Item #2: Wok-a-thon

Broder vR passed me a wok for christmas. I finally busted that shit out in style.

What you are looking at here is a mint chutney, tuna marsala samosas, stir-fried onions, peppers, zucchini and cashews, and garlic naan. My diet is amazing.

Speaking of samosas, I owe the recipe to the broad in this video:

Facts and Lies

Monday, December 7th, 2009

So I finally got some rippering in this weekend. The jewel of the Midwest, Tyrol Basin opened up so me and Keith dragged ourselves over there to ride. It was as much fun as you can imagine. It’s also important to note that this place, as awesome as it is, is tiny. You know at Northstar, the last little down slope coming out of the park, where they have the halpipe? That’s about 3x the size of Tyrol. Most importantly, don’t forget your bloody mary.

 Then I went home and signed my shit up on Riders’ Journal. Rider’s Journal is a slick little website that lets you record the days you spend riding. Where you go, who you rode with, what your rode for the day, and you can even let other riders know what costume you wore that day. New this year Riders’ Journal will even let you set up goal for your season. None of that I want to do back-to-back cab 1080s but more like, “I want to ride 8 days and consume 17 drinks at the slope-side bar. And remember pics or if didn’t happen. (this has been a paid endorsement from ridersjournal.com. I get paid in stickers, which is better than mtnops.net)

 So then this morning my friend Lorenius is claiming she has some kind of missing-link Letter Press. The fucking Lucy machine if you will. I guess there were a few steps between the Guttenberg and the Canon mp600. Then she sent me this image:

x-ibit A x-ibit A 

I’m thinking this rig is certainly on the great ape side of the missing link, but none the less she’s claiming this is some sort of machina ex deus. And to really get down on it, I’ve been around. I make the occasional rueben sandwich, or at least have the help cook one up for me. I know a damn meat slicer when I see one.

x-ibit B x-ibit B Letterpress me some pastrami, please.

MM Food

Thursday, November 5th, 2009

About a week and a half ago I took this pic:

For those of you who don’t know, that’s the French Keef. Montreal Poutine flipped with a sausage gravy to give it that extra Wisconsin love. I tried to send it many main Kiwi in Montreal, A. Love, but here’s where it turns into a TV sitcom: I sent it to the wrong email. I shredded the gnar when i should have slashed the pow.

 Within moments i’ve got a reply email saying email recipient has no clue who i am, but that dish looks disgusting and delicious at the same time.

 So using my amazing prejudging skills I decide Mr. GAusten of somewhere outside Toronto is an alright dood. The game was on over the next seven days I bombed the shit out of his inbox. And i’ve got to say the dude is quick. I woud hang out with him.  Here’s a sample of my diet and the Images GAusten received:

 It has begun!

 

I got to admit, GAusten was a good sport about this, He often commented on the food and the fingers of the people involved.

 Thanks for playing along.

Questionable Cuisine Challenge ‘9

Thursday, October 29th, 2009

Seeing this last night launched a plan into action:

The French Keef The French Keef 

What: The Questionable Cuisine Challenge ‘9
When: December 5, 2009
Where: Milwaukee
Who: Me and you and everyone we know that shows up.

 How it works: Participants will gather and be given maps and the exact order of the Challenge. Thus far the known stops include:

  • Speed Queen for Ribs
  • Champion Chicken
  • That chicken joint on Wisconsin Ave
  • Judy’s Red Hots for sausages and hookers (or bangers and bangers)
  • JJ’s Fish and Chicken
  • NYPD (New York Pizza Department)

6 stops.  At each stop you are expected to consume 1 value meal-style order. You can choose 1 bye.  After the circuit has been run, we will reconvene for High Lifes and general sitting around and feeling sick.

 Participants are expected to use Twitter throughout the excursion. This will allow those who can’t make it to eat along at home

 If you vomit you have to start over.

 drop a comment if you ‘re interested or email rvr@rumorator.com

Credit were credit is due: This event was in inspired by the creators Hister Worldwide Heavy Industries Concern, who threw down the original ghetto trifecta.  However we’re talking it to a whole new level.  R.I.P. Hister